A new photo caption contest

Don't you think this picture deserves a caption? Show your creativity, and share you suggestions using McLinky or the comment section:

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And here are the winners for last week's contest, found here:

Terri Schiavo remembered

5 years ago today, and nearly 2 weeks after her feeding tube was discontinued, a young woman named Terri Schiavo died. Her death occurred after a seven year court battle between her husband and guardian, Michael Schiavo, and her parents, Robert and Mary Schindler. Michael argued that Terry had been in a persistent vegetative state; no fewer than six physicians had confirmed this diagnosis over a period of years. Her parents argued that she was conscious.

Terri’s parents also argued that, as a devout Roman Catholic, Terri would not want to violate the Church’s teachings on euthanasia. The Church does not, however, oppose the discontinuation of “extraordinary measures” to continue life in all circumstances. The official position of the Church is found in # 2278 of the Catechism of the Catholic Church:

Discontinuing medical procedures that are burdensome, dangerous, extraordinary, or disproportionate to the expected outcome can be legitimate; it is the refusal of "over-zealous" treatment. Here one does not will to cause death; one's inability to impede it is merely accepted. The decisions should be made by the patient if he is competent and able or, if not, by those legally entitled to act for the patient, whose reasonable will and legitimate interests must always be respected.

Is provision of hydration and nutrition to a person in a persistent vegetative state an “extraordinary measure”, or is it the bare minimum of care to be provided to everyone? I submit that there is room for reasonable people to disagree on this issue.

With regard to Terri Schiavo, it had been a long and contentious battle. Eventually, pro-life and disability groups weighed in on the issue. President Bush signed legislation which aimed to keep her alive. The case was appealed 14 times as it made its way up through the court system in Florida. Motions to bring the case before the Supreme Court of the United States were denied.

Ultimately, Michael asked the court to act as a surrogate for Terri and to determine what she would decide if she were able. Ultimately, the court made the determination that Terri would not wish to continue measures to prolong her life. Such measures were discontinued on March 18, 2005; she died 13 days later.

So I now bring these questions to those of you who read this.

• Is it ever acceptable to withdraw hydration?
• Is it ever acceptable to withdraw nutritional support?
• In the event of disagreement between close family members (parents, siblings, spouse, children), who should decide what care to give (or withhold)?
• If a person who is unable to make medical decisions has previously signed a living will, should the wishes expressed there always be carried out?
• What about you: do you have a living will?
• Have you appointed someone to act as your medical proxy (medical power of attorney)?

A feat of forgiveness

Somehow I doubt that I’m the only person on earth who has struggled at some point in my life with forgiveness. It can be a fearsome battle.

At times it may seem satisfying to hold on to anger, but when anger us retained, it almost inevitably become bitterness. And bitterness can turn me ugly from the inside out.

But read this quote from a young woman who testifies to the value of choosing a different approach:

After Thanksgiving December 3, 1975, two rough young men broke into our family home in Blacksburg, Virginia and shot my Mother and Daddy and me. My parents died and I lived to tell the story. After many years of struggling in the darkness I began to heal…


I've used many tools to heal but the most helpful tool was and is forgiveness. I couldn't hold onto the darkness and bitterness anymore. I needed to let go for a selfish reason—my peace of mind.

- Carol Dreiling

As powerful as her story is, we have an even more powerful example to follow as we move toward Good Friday, don't we? We have a Savior who said, "So watch yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him." (Luke 17:3-4) When Peter asked if we should forgive seven times, Jesus said, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." (Matthew 18:22) And then, as he hung on the Cross, he said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34)

Jesus not only told us to do it, but he showed us how it is done. And indeed, praying for the one who has hurt me has been a critical element of the process of forgiveness in my life.

How about you? Have you struggled with forgiveness? Have you been able to win the battle?

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The wisdom of Emilie Weil

In an article in The Criterion Online Edition put out by the Archdiocese of Indianapolis, you can read about "supercentenarian" Emilie Weil, who celebrated her 110th birthday in January 2010.

110 years old, she lived during the 19th, 20th, and 21st centuries. 20 U.S. presidents served during her lifetime. Her husband died 67 years ago after only 11 years of marriage, leaving her to raise their seven children. She later returned to work as a nurse.

Today, Mrs. Weil enjoys spending time with her family, painting, reading, and talking about one of her favorite topics: her relationship with God and her love of the Church. And those who know her agree that Emelies has retained her zest for life throughout 11 decades.

What advice does she offer us? "Just say your prayers, and do the best you can.” When asked how to find happiness in life, Mrs. Weil said, "Be faithful to God".

What about you? What advice would you like to pass on to generations to come?

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A gifted girl draws heaven, and draws hearts to God

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Sunday Smiles: Warning Label Wisdom.

On a pair of bicycle shin guards:
SHIN PADS CANNOT PROTECT ANY PART OF THE BODY THEY DO NOT COVER

On a label on a toilet at a public sports facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan :
RECYCLED FLUSH WATER UNSAFE FOR DRINKING
(EEEOOOWWW.)

The label on an electric wood router cautions:
THIS PRODUCT NOT INTENDED FOR USE AS A DENTAL DRILL

On a blanket from Taiwan -
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO

On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU

On a Taiwanese shampoo -
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE

On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavored milk drink -
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT

In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles-
OPEN OTHER END

On a Sears hairdryer -
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING

On a bag of Fritos -
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE

On a bar of Dial soap -
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box) -
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING

On a Korean kitchen knife -
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY

On a Japanese food processor -
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE

On Sainsbury's peanuts -
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS

On a Swedish chainsaw -
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS

On a child's superman costume -
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY

On some frozen dinners -
SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box -
FITS ONE HEAD

On packaging for a Rowenta iron -
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY
(Excellent advice.)

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Fickleness and faithfulness

On Palm Sunday, Catholics begin their church service outside with a reading that reminds us of the crowds welcoming Jesus:

As he rode along,
the people were spreading their cloaks on the road;
and now as he was approaching the slope of the Mount of Olives,
the whole multitude of his disciples
began to praise God aloud with joy
for all the mighty deeds they had seen.
They proclaimed:
“Blessed is the king who comes
in the name of the Lord.
Peace in heaven
and glory in the highest.”

- Luke 19: 36-38

After processing into the church, the usual order of the Mass is followed. When it comes time for the reading of the Gospel, the Passion of Christ is then read. The contrast is striking: the crowd which welcomed him with praise on Palm Sunday began to shout “Crucify Him!” just a few short days later. The crowd that honored him one week, hated him the next. Cries of devotion were transformed into calls for death. How can we help but recognize the fickleness of man?

But there is another side to the story, one that reminds us of the faithfulness of God. Here we see it summarized by Saint Leo the Great:

He took the nature of a servant without stain of sin, enlarging our humanity without diminishing his divinity. He emptied himself; though invisible he made himself visible, though Creator and Lord of all things he chose to be one of us mortal men. Yet this was the condescension of compassion, not the loss of omnipotence. So he who in the nature of God had created man, became in the nature of a servant, man himself. Thus the Son of God enters this lowly world. He comes down from the throne of heaven, yet does not separate himself from the Father’s glory. He is born in a new condition, by a new birth.


"He was born in a new condition, for, invisible in his own nature, he became visible in ours. Beyond our grasp, he chose to come within our grasp. Existing before time began, he began to exist at a moment in time. Lord of the universe, he hid his infinite glory and took the nature of a servant. Incapable of suffering as God, he did not refuse to be a man, capable of suffering. Immortal, he chose to be subject to the laws of death. He who is true God is also true man.

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A 24-hour challenge

Can you go for 24 hours without saying anything unkind about or to anyone?

I often challenge workshop audiences to try to do so. Always, some people laugh nervously. They’re sure they can’t go a whole day without making an unkind reference about another person.

“Then you have a serious problem,” I tell them. “Because if I were to ask you whether you can go for 24 hours without drinking any alcohol and you said that you can’t, that means you’re an alcoholic. And if you can’t go for 24 hours without smoking a cigarette, that means you’re addicted to nicotine. And if you can’t go for 24 hours without speaking unkindly about or to another, that means you’ve lost control over your mouth.”

If you are willing to carry out this experiment, check your watch. Resolve that until this time tomorrow, you won’t say anything negative about another person. (The only exception will be the very rare instance where it’s necessary to transmit such information: You learn, for example, that a friend of yours is about to date a man who beat his ex-wife.)

Throughout the day, you will constantly monitor how you speak. If you need to criticize, you will restrict your criticism to the incident that provoked your ire and not engage in a generalized attack on the person who angered you. If you enter into an argument, you will argue fairly, without allowing your disagreement to degenerate into name-calling or other forms of verbal abuse. Throughout the day, you will not disseminate negative rumors. You will refrain from defaming groups as well as individuals.

In other words, for a full 24 hours you will follow the Golden Rule, speaking about and to others with the same kindness and fairness you wish them to exercise when speaking about and to you. You will act as a person of good character, focused on helping people with your deeds and healing them with your words. At the least, you will not hurt people with your words.

– Joseph Telushkin

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Think the Old Testament is boring? Read this.

I think this is one of the most amazing and wonderful stories in the entire Bible!

The hand of the LORD was upon me, and he brought me out by the Spirit of the LORD and set me in the middle of a valley; it was full of bones. He led me back and forth among them, and I saw a great many bones on the floor of the valley, bones that were very dry. He asked me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”

      I said, “O Sovereign LORD, you alone know.” 

Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the LORD! This is what the Sovereign LORD says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the LORD.’”

So I prophesied as I was commanded. And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them.

Then he said to me, “Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, son of man, and say to it, ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.’ “ So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army.

Then he said to me: “Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They say, ‘Our bones are dried up and our hope is gone; we are cut off.’ Therefore prophesy and say to them: ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD says: O my people, I am going to open your graves and bring you up from them; I will bring you back to the land of Israel. Then you, my people, will know that I am the LORD, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the LORD have spoken, and I have done it, declares the LORD.’”

- Ezekiel 37:1-14

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This week's contest: can you think of a caption for this photo?

Use McLinky or the caption section below to offer your suggestions. Winners will be announced next week.

(Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that IS cement.)

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Take my Son....

A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art..

When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son. About a month later, just before Christmas, there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands..

He said, “Sir, you don”t know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly... He often talked about you, and your love for art.” The young man held out this package. “I know this isn”t much. I”m not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this.”

The father opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the e painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture.. “Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It”s a gift.”

The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.

He died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings. Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection. On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. “We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?”

There was silence...

Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, “We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one.”

But the auctioneer persisted. “Will somebody bid for this painting? Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?”

Another voice angrily. “We didn”t come to see this painting.. We came to see the Van Gogh”s, the Rembrandts. Get on with the Real bids!”

But still the auctioneer continued. “The son! The son! Who”ll take the son?”

Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. “I”ll give $10 for the painting...” Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.

“We have $10, who will bid $20?”

“Give it to him for $10. Let”s see the masters.”

The crowd was becoming angry. They didn”t want the picture of the son. They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.

The auctioneer pounded the gavel.. “Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!”

A man sitting on the second row shouted, “Now let”s get on with the collection!”

The auctioneer laid down his gavel. “I”m sorry, the auction is over.”

“What about the paintings?”

“I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will... I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings. The man who took the son gets everything!”

God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: “The son, the son, who”ll take the son?” Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,

that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

THAT”S love.

A soldier visits a dying man.

I received this story in my email. I don't know if it's true, but it has an important message.

A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened.

Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young u uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.

The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength.
Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine move away and rest awhile. He refused. Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients.

Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.

Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.

Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.

"Who was that man?" he asked.

The nurse was startled, "He was your father," she answered.

"No, he wasn't," the Marine replied. "I never saw him before in my life."

"Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?"

"I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn't here. When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed. I came here tonight to find a Mr. William Grey. His son was killed in Iraq today, and I was sent to inform him. What was this gentleman's name?”

The Nurse, with tears in her eyes, answered, “His name was Mr. William Grey.”

The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay.

WE ARE NOT HUMAN BEINGS GOING THROUGH A TEMPORARY SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE. WE ARE SPIRITUAL BEINGS GOING THROUGH A TEMPORARY HUMAN EXPERIENCE.

Have a great day, and bless someone else in some little way today. This is what we are put on earth to do anyway, right?

A lesson from a skunk?

I found this headline intriguing:

COLORADO SKUNK’S HEAD FREED FROM PEANUT BUTTER JAR

The story involves the rescue of a skunk by an intrepid wildlife officer who spent 10 minutes working to pry a peanut butter jar off the head of a skunk who’d experimented with a new delicacy and found itself in trouble. Once freed, the skunk ran off. Nobody got sprayed, and apparently the skunk was no worse for wear.

This story got me chuckling, and then it got me thinking in allegorical terms:

How often does the urge to try something new or tasty or tempting get me in trouble?

How often does God rescue me from predicaments of my own making?

When he does, how do I respond? Do I make a stink? Do I run away? Or do I stick around and show gratitude in some way?

How about you? Is there anything to be learned from the skunk stuck in the jar?

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Mom and Dad: how much do you charge?

Our little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper, and he handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his mom dried her hands on an apron, she read it, and this is what it said:

• For cutting the grass $5.00
• For cleaning up my room this week $1.00
• For going to the store for you $ .50
• Babysitting my kid brother while you went shopping $ .25
• Taking out the garbage $1.00
• For getting a good report card $5.00
• For cleaning up and raking the yard $2.00
• Total owed: $14.75

Well, I’ll tell you, his mother looked at him standing there expectantly, and, boy, could I see the memories flashing through her mind. So she picked up the pen and turned over the paper he’d written on, and this is what she wrote:

• For the nine months I carried you while you were growing inside me, No Charge.
• For all the nights that I’ve sat up with you, doctored and prayed for you, No Charge.
• For all the trying times, and all the tears that you’ve caused through the years, No Charge.
• When you add it all up, the cost of my love is No Charge.
• For all the nights that were filled with dread, and for the worries I knew were ahead, there’s No Charge.
• For the toys, food, clothes, and even wiping your nose, there’s No Charge, Son.
• And when you add it all up, the full cost of real love is No Charge.

Well friends, when our son finished reading what his mother had written, there were great big old tears in his eyes, and he looked straight up at his mother and said, ‘Mom, I sure do love you.’

And then he took the pen and in great big letters he wrote: ‘PAID IN FULL’.

– M. Adams

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What goes around, comes around.

One day a man saw a old lady, stranded on the side of the road, but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out.

His Pinto was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so. Was he going to hurt her? He didn't look safe; he looked poor and hungry.

He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you. He said, 'I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson.'

Well, all she had was a flat tire, But for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.

As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid.

Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty, who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.

He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, 'And think of me..'

He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.

A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps.

The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her Feet for the whole day couldn't erase.

The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan .

After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill. The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be. Then she noticed something written on the napkin.

There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: 'You don't owe me anything. I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you.'

Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.

Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard....

She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, 'Everything's going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson.'

There is an old saying......'What goes around comes around.' Today I sent you this story, and I'm asking you to pass it on. Let this light shine.

Don't delete it, don't return it. Simply, pass this on to a friend.

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This week's chuckle: the travails of travel agents

The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response ... click.

A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said, "But they look so close on the map."

Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay-over in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went very fast and she bought that!

A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"

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Now that you've had your Sunday chuckle, go here for a Springtime treat. Simply drag your mouse over the screen and watch the magic happen. H/T to Priest’s Secretary for this one!

Happy Spring!

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Thanks be to God!

 

Suppose for a moment that God began taking from us the many things for which we have failed to give thanks.

Which of our limbs and faculties would be left?

Would I still have my hands and my mind?

And what about my loved ones?

If God were to take from me all those persons and things for which I have not given thanks, what would be left of me?

- Patrick Henry Reardon

Psalm 100: A psalm. For giving thanks.

Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.

Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.

Know that the LORD is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.

For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Finding union with God in the silence

I have, in the past, had to detach myself from the busy-ness of things – even if the busy-ness was good (ie studying the Bible, conversing with on-line lists, etc) – it does no good if you cannot unite yourself with God.

Find the silence and in the silence listen to the whisper of God. Once you hear that whisper, you will find that He is there, and He will help you out with the rest.

Through detachment you will find a simple nakedness that allows you to be alone with God. Then you will find the peace and patience required to handle the rest, for with God, we can do, and deal, with anything.

– Annette Cuvellier

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Do you find it easy to detach, to be alone with God? 

Do you have tips for others who may find this difficult to do?

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Check here for 7 Quick Takes at Conversion Diary!

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Are you rich?

How much money do you have to have to be considered rich in today’s society?

Some say about $1.3 million per family member. Others say about $5 million per family. Some individuals have told me you should have unearned income of about $500,000 per year to be considered rich.

But I keep thinking of how many people I know with far more than that who do not seem happy. On the other hand, I know many people who have trouble paying their bills yet are really well-off.

If you can share any problem with your wife, you’re rich.

If you can face your parents and believe you have given back to them even a hint of what they gave you, you’re rich.

If you can take an afternoon off to go boating with your pal, you’re rich.

If you can honestly say you have nothing to hide, you are really, really rich.

– Benjamin J. Stein.

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 How about you? Are you rich?

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

The transformative power of thinking outside of the box.

Niue is a small island in the South Pacific, commonly known as the Rock of Polynesia. It is officially self-governing, although in practice New Zealand conducts diplomatic relations on behalf of residents of Niue. Queen Elizabeth II is its official head of state.

It seems that until the 18th century, there was no government to speak of in Niue. Rather, chiefs and heads of families led segments of the population. The first European to settle there was Captain Cook, and for the next few centuries, “moderns” knew the island by the name of Savage Island.

In 2001, the “Savages” of Niue showed that they have “come a long way, baby” when the former “Savage Island” became known as the “WiFi Nation”. Niue was the first territory to offer all of its residents free wireless internet. As of August 2008, 100% of its primary and high school students have a specialized laptop provided by the One Laptop per Child project, or OLP-XO-1.

The OLP-XO-1 project was developed by a Greek-American architect and computer scientist named Nicholas Negroponte, and its stated goal is to provide children in developing countries a specially-designed laptop to be used as a learning tool. Their website can be found here.

People who read this blog regularly may wonder why this post has been included. My point is this: sometimes the most transformative ideas come from thinking “outside of the box”. A case in point: the transformation of “Savage Island” into the world’s first “WiFi Nation”. When we reflect on opportunities to give back to others, we limit ourselves by choosing the obvious.

Negroponte seems to have followed the advice found in 1 Peter 4:10 - Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

A new photo caption contest

Can you think of a caption for this week's photo? It's always fun to see your creative ideas! Use McLinky or the comment sections below to submit your entries. Winners will be announced next week.

And here are the winner's for last week's contest, found here:

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Some wisdom from Thomas Merton

 Enjoy these quotes from Thomas Merton:

A life is either all spiritual or not spiritual at all. No man can serve two masters. Your life is shaped by the end you live for. You are made in the image of what you desire.

The tighter you squeeze, the less you have.

Do not be too quick to condemn the man who no longer believes in God: for it is perhaps your own coldness and avarice and mediocrity and materialism and selfishness that have chilled his faith.

The first step toward finding God, Who is Truth, is to discover the truth about myself: and if I have been in error, this first step to truth is the discovery of my error.

In the last analysis, the individual person is responsible for living his own life and for "finding himself." If he persists in shifting his responsibility to somebody else, he fails to find out the meaning of his own existence.

We are not at peace with others because we are not at peace with ourselves, and we are not at peace with ourselves because we are not at peace with God.

By reading the scriptures I am so renewed that all nature seems renewed around me and with me. The sky seems to be a pure, a cooler blue, the trees a deeper green. The whole world is charged with the glory of God and I feel fire and music under my feet.

Every moment and every event of every man's life on earth plants something in his soul.

Just remaining quietly in the presence of God, listening to Him, being attentive to Him, requires a lot of courage and know-how.

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Girl Scouts of America: “Happy, Healthy, and Hot"

The Girl Scouts of America have gone modern, as you can see here. Since its inception in 1912, the Girl Scouts of America have rewritten their mission statement several times. Here they are:

1912 - "To train girls to take their rightful places in life, first as good women, then as good citizens, wives and mothers."

1917 - The purpose of this corporation is to promote, through organization and co-operation with other agencies, the virtues of womanhood, by training girls to recognize their obligations to God and Country, to prepare for the duties devolving upon women in the home, in society and the state, and to guide others in ways conducive to personal honor and the public good.

1924 - The purpose of this organization is to help girls to realize the ideals of womanhood as a preparation for their responsibilities in the home and service to the community.

1953 - The Girl Scout organization is dedicated to helping girls develop as happy, resourceful individuals willing to share their abilities as citizens in their homes, their communities, their country and the world.

The most recent version is “Girl Scouting builds girls of courage, confidence and character, who make the world a better place.”

I suppose it is rather “dated” to use the 1912 motto. Many do not consider the “rightful place” of girls to become “good women, then as good citizens, wives and mothers” Over the years, the motto has caught up with the times. And so, apparently, has the sort of training the organization provides to its young members.

A recent meeting of the World Association of Girl Guides and Girl Scouts hosted a panel which included Planned Parenthood (PP). PP distributed brochures titled “Happy, Healthy, and Hot" which included the following advice:

“Many people think sex is just about vaginal or anal intercourse… But, there are lots of different ways to have sex and lots of different types of sex. There is no right or wrong way to have sex. Just have fun, explore and be yourself!” In the brochure, girls are encouraged to “Improve your sex life by getting to know your own body. Play with yourself! Masturbation is a great way to find out more about your body and what you find sexually stimulating. Mix things up by using different kinds of touch from very soft to hard. Talk about or act out your fantasies. Talk dirty to (your sexual partner).”

The Girl Scouts of America bills itself as “the world's largest organization dedicated to all girls ages 5-17”. During my years as a 5- to 17-year-old, I was given only one message by my parents, my school, and my church with regard to sexual activity: “Be abstinent until marriage.” This was the right message, and I firmly believe this message is far more likely to develop women of "courage, confidence and character, who make the world a better place".

Read the complete story here.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

If you need a Sunday laugh, these should help!

According to a recent email, these are from a book called 'Disorder in the American Courts' and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
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ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
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ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
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ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
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ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
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ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
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ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
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ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
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ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
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ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
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ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 pm.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
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ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
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ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

God be with you!

May the God of gentleness be with you, 

caressing you with sunlight and rain, 

caressing you with rain and wind. 

May his tenderness shine through you, 

to warm all those who are hurt and alone. 

May the God of strength be with you, 

holding you in strong fingered hands. 

May you be a sacrament of His strength 

to those whose hands you hold. 

May the God of gentleness be with you, 

caressing you with sunlight and rain, 

caressing you with rain and wind. 

– Anonymous.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Marriage or Relationship With a Significant Other?

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say it's not quite as good as his mother's… then adopt a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ...then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies ...then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores ...then adopt a dog!

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually ..then adopt a dog.

BUT, on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness ...then adopt a cat!

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Jesus with a beer and a smoke?

According to this CNA article, bishops in India have voiced strong objections to a picture in a children's textbook that shows Jesus holding a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other. In a statement released by the bishops, they say, "We are deeply offended by the blasphemous image of Christ used on school books and on posters. We feel sad and indignant for this act of sacrilege."

I don't consider myself to be especially prudish, I must admit the picture offends me, too. There doesn't seem to be any reason to include such an image unless the objective is to shock and offend.

But take a look at the picture and see what you think:

The company which included the picture in their publication has apologized, stating that the photo was included in textbooks due to "human error." I think it clearly demonstrated a serious error in judgment, but perhaps it should also stimulate us to do a bit of introspection. How do we treat others who come from a religious tradition different from our own? Do we treat them with the same sort of respect we want for ourselves?

I wonder: is it possible that the root of religious intolerance is confusion between wholehearted acceptance and complete indifference? Is religious bigotry caused by failure to recognize that it is possible to accept that someone's beliefs differ from our own without accepting their beliefs as our own?

What do you think?

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Don’t forget to enter the Gospel Giveaway! 
And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

Please go to 7 Quick Takes each Friday for some great "reads".

Do it anyway.

In Matthew 3, Jesus comes to his cousin John and asks for baptism. In the verses before this request, John had said, “I baptize you with water for repentance. But after me will come one who is more powerful than I, whose sandals I am not fit to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.” He knew that he was not worthy of such an honor, but he did it anyway. Immediately afterward, the heavens opened and “a voice from heaven said, ‘This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.’”

In Luke 5, we’re told that Simon and his fellow fisherman had a bad night. Although they had worked hard, they hadn’t caught a thing. Discouraged, they finally gave up and were washing their nets. But despite his misgivings, when Jesus told Simon to once again lower his nets into the water, he did it anyway... and caught so many fish that the boats were in danger of sinking!

In John 2, Mary saw the predicament of the hosts at a wedding she attended with her son: they’d run out of wine. She told the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.” And although they must have been puzzled at his instructions, they did it anyway. They filled the jars with water and took a sample to the master of the banquet. And the water had been changed into finest wine.

In Matthew 14, the disciples were puzzled when Jesus told them to feed a crowd of 5000 people. They knew they didn’t have enough to go around. But they followed Jesus’ instructions and brought a few loaves and fish to him. Although it must have seemed a bit crazy to think that a crowd of that size could be fed with so little, they did it anyway. And the crowd was fed, all were satisfied, and twelve baskets were filled with leftovers.

Sometimes we may think God is calling us to do something strange, perhaps even impossible.

But do it anyway.

The results may surprise you.

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Don’t forget to enter the Gospel Giveaway! 
And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

This week's caption contest

It's time for this week's contest!

Can you think of a caption for this picture? What do you think that puppy has to say for himself? What about his owner?

Share your ideas using McLinky or the comments section below. Winners will be announced nest week.

 

And here are the winners from last week's caption contest:

I could just scream.

According to this CathNews USA article,a Tampa Bay, Florida woman decided to use new technology to share her abortion with the world. Angie Jackson made a YouTube video in which she said, "I am having an abortion - right now." She also used Twitter to broadcast the event.

"It's not that bad, it's not that scary, it's basically like a miscarriage. I am live tweeting my abortion on Twitter, not for a publicity stunt or attention or to justify it for myself. I am at peace with my decision."

I guess I miss the point. If not to publicize or justify the event, what other conceivable reason would she have for doing this? And perhaps she was indeed "at peace" with her decision... but it can't have been a surprise to her that many people would consider her actions to be hostile and offensive at best.

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And there's still time enter this week’s caption contest, found here.

A fun idea... and a give-away, besides!

I ran into an idea from a now-defunct blog; the author last posted in 2005. But I enjoyed his idea and wanted to share it. I hope you'll join in!

Using your birth month and day, 

find the corresponding verse from each Gospel 

and share them with us. 

To increase the fun, 

share this link with a few of your friends - 

hopefully lots of people will chime in.

My "birthday verses" almost spell out a story:

• Matthew 5:14 - You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.
• Mark 5:14 - Those tending the pigs ran off and reported this in the town and countryside, and the people went out to see what had happened.
• Luke 5:14 - Then Jesus ordered him, "Don't tell anyone, but go, show yourself to the priest and offer the sacrifices that Moses commanded for your cleansing, as a testimony to them."
• John 5:14 - Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, "See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you."

To make it even more interesting, on Easter Monday I'll choose a winner at random from those who share their verses with us. The winner will receive a copy of The Five People You Meet In Heaven, by Mitch Albom. (Note - you'll have to be sure I have a way to get in touch with you, so please include your email address or "Twitter" me at NC_Sue!)

Don’t forget to enter this week’s contest, found here.
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This week, I'm participating in Sleeping with Bread. 

And the question I've chosen to respond to this week is:
When did I have the greatest sense of belonging?

And my answer?

I feel the greatest sense of belonging when I'm with my husband, no matter where we are. With him, I know that I will be accepted, supported, and loved.

All the time.

Every time. 

This week's chuckle: Forrest Gump goes to heaven

The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.

St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you.. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone.The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."

Forrest responds, "It sure is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance exam. I sure hope that the test ain't too hard. Life was a big enough test as it was."

St. Peter continued, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.

• First:What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
• Second:How many seconds are there in a year?
• Third:What is God's first name?"

Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."

Forrest replied, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the week begins with the letter 'T'? Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and Tomorrow."

The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give you credit for that answer. How about the next one?" asked St. Peter. "How many seconds in a year?"

"Now that one is harder," replied Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve."

Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd..."

"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will have to give you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name?"

"Sure," Forrest replied, "it's Andy."

"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"

"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,' Forrest replied.. 'I learnt it from the song,

ANDY WALKS WITH ME,

ANDY TALKS WITH ME,

ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates, and said: "Run, Forrest, run."

Don’t forget to enter this week’s contest, found here.